Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Frustration and Renewal

I planned on writing every day all month, but I don't have to because I am doing it for myself and family and friends and Ruth.  I don't want to get that bad taste in my mouth of just having to come up with anything at all to write about.  I don't feel comfortable with that.  I want my words to count on things that pertain/speak to me. 

Call it hard to keep up.  Call it lost of interest.  Call it you can't do it naturally.  Call it you're not a real writer.  Call it whatever you want.  I just can't write every day.  Is there something wrong with that? 

I do love to write--always have.  I do need to be pushed and have a deadline, but I also have to have a purpose.  Posts should be uplifting but life is not always like that.  I do look for the good and positive and don't like to be around people who can't manage that.  Some days are just hard to be positive and SAVOR. 

Teaching taught me a lot.
 
Don't take things personal. 
Shake it off. 
Make your own perks.
Be consistent.
Be fair.

Can life's lessons be any better than that?  As a child I was not given much guidance which I needed.  I was passive because I didn't know if things were right or wrong.  I knew things weren't good.  Auntie Mary took me to her Baptist Church, and they taught me what was right and wrong.  I clung to that.  I identified with that.  But I needed more.  I still remained passive after college.  I learned about family from my husband.  I learned about family having my own three sons and having five grandchildren.  I am still learning.  I know now I missed a lot in my childhood.  At least, I now know what family is.  I am almost 67 years old and have discovered much in the last 10 years. 

I am thankful to have been able to have aged and discovered what I was never taught as a child.

Life has been good to me.

Side note:  Snow storm tonight.  I am looking desperately for spring after a very long winter. 


 

4 comments:

  1. You are right. Writing is your choice and you don't have to write if you don't feel/want/need. Today's post is clearly one that needed to be shared - with thoughts about family and valuable life-lessons. After reading this I'd like to send you a virtual hug. I promise to you (on behalf of Mother Nature) that spring will eventually come.

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  2. I'm always glad when you write. Ruth got me into this mess, and now I just can't let it go, so I'll keep on writing (at least for a while). I love the way writing makes you notice, think, and preserve bits of life. I wish I'd known this when my son was growing up.

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  3. I loved reading this post. I can tell how much love you have for your family. I hope they read this post. Thank you for sharing. With five grandchildren I am sure you are LOVING life and living life to its fullest. :)

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  4. I needed this list today. Thank you.

    Thanks for writing -- even when it's hard; even when you don't think you have something to say. Your story matters. To me...to you...to the world.

    I'm glad you keep putting down words. It's almost as you put down words, you put down the roots you missed in childhood. Hmmm...just a fleeting thought, but maybe...maybe.

    Love you,
    Ruth

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